Sunday, January 13, 2008

"old" age

Sure! 58 (my current biological age) is more than 38 is more than 18 is less than 78 ... I do recall, when 18, thinking of those of 38 as super old, having nothing in their life, and certainly those of 58 already dead!

Now that I am 58, I'd like to let those of 18 and 38 know that we are not dead, that we have laughter and joy in our lives, that we too yearn to be loved, held and embraced and to hold and to embrace, that we are curious, we look around the corner, we travel unknown, sometimes forbidden, paths and, although we might nap a bit more during the day, we are very much alive!

But, will they listen? Did I?

5 comments:

David said...

Hello Dubravko, congratualations on starting the blog, it's nice of you to allow others to get to know you better!

Here is my comment about the ages-divide: instead of trying to reach those 18-year-olds who are not interested in the things that matter to you, maybe you could keep an eye out for the rare ones that DO share your values. They probably feel very lonely among their peers. I know I did, when I was that age.

-David

gyanarthi said...

well I don't know...
the other day I noticed that most of my myspace friends were in their 30's (I mean the ones i know personally.)
They all know I'm 66 and been dead for many, many years.

In fact just that discussion of life, death, age and aliveness came up the other nite.

I found myself at an after-party following a very trippy concert this weekend... we partied all night... I imagine they were all in their 30's.

the folks from the band that played were there, and lots of the others were musicians. The conversations (I put that in the plural, because most of us were somewhat disassociated at the time)often spun around music, and were often rather strange.

Anyhow, musical recollections that had me in states of reverie occurred before most of them were born. Little by little, as I rattled on, they began to put together that I was way older than they thought... and when I told about the old age home I live in they started screaming for my ID...

We had great time together... I learned about a lot of the western music I missed between 1972 and 2002 when i was into other genres... they perhaps saw they didn't have to crumble into old age if they lived in the moment that ever is.

A sweet lady helped me to my car around 8AM - even gave me their phone number to call in case I got lost on the way home...

Well, dubravko, that's what comes up for me in response to your query.
Also, the reason I didn't respond earlier was that when I got home from the party I slept for about 24 hours... I've been a little groggy since and just now waking up :)

Dubravko said...

Thanks gyanarthi for your comment. Part of your comment about people at the party "screaming for your ID" actually confirms my thesis, does it not?

People do expect a 66 year old to be as full of life as you are. Why? Perhaps most 66-year olds really do not have a life or are just hiding. What do you think?

gyanarthi said...

Dubravko, I'm not sure what your thesis is.

The folks at the party didn't change their attitude to me after they knew my age. They became more curious about my experience when they realized I lived in times and places that have since become mythic.

There wasn't a sense of surprise at someone my age being filled with life, so much as their mistaking my age by 15-20 years. There are lots of old hippies around the scene these folks live in. And I look a little younger than my age.

Another thing, ageism is not so much a factor on the jam band music scene. If anything, there is a certain reverence for the elders who have lived/are living the life they are living.

Before I started talking about where I've been and what I've done, I was just someone older than they were. No one was trying to figure out my age. They just put me in the "older dude" category. Like I put them in the "younger" category.

I've been on the alternative scene since I was 19 - I've always had close friends who were lots older, just like I have close friends now who are lots younger. The thing we all shared was our common sense of being.

I/we like being around folks who are "alive" - it doesn't matter what their age. If they play in the moment - I'm down with them. There is no age in the "now."

If folks live mainly in the past and/or the future, there's not too much there to hang out with. I'm not comfortable with them, and they typically run from me as well.

It's nice the way that works.

The one disturbing thing I read into your thesis... what I sense as a seed of separation... is your saying you want to let them know that you, at the grand old age of 58, are still alive.

If/when you're alive - other folks know it. They don't need to be told. They may be scared of it, and stay away. Or they may come to it.

When they come, they come as brothers and sisters with their own flames burning bright and look to play. Not to be taught anything. In this regard there's nothing to teach - nothing to learn - just to be.

It's too bad you don't like the bluegrass/jamband music... one of the festival's I go to would fix you right up :)

Dubravko said...

Actually, I like bluegrass music very much, just not enough time to attend. Also, with exceptions, I am getting more involved in creating things myself rather than witnessing other people doing it - I have no talents for bluegrass.

(I left out "not" in "People do expect..." in my previous comment which is probably quite obvious from the gist of the comment.)